New Moon

A blood-sucker. A meat eater. An idiot. Combine the three and you get: New Moon.


Anyone with the right mind knows that a real vampire(or werewolf) movie has lots of blood. And gore. And chill. Anyone with the right mind also knows that girls hate vampires. And werewolves. That makes one think: Why are 99% of the readers and watchers of New Moon, girls?

There can be only ONE thing: This is NOT a real vampire/werewolf/idiot movie.

Or wait, it could be a idiot movie.

To be honest, I haven't watched New Moon. But I have watched trailers. Ads. Sneak peeks. Reviews. And it has not changed my opinion. At all. In fact, it may have reinforced it.

Before all the girl fans of NM start throwing rotten eggs, let me quote a New Moon review, ok: "This movie is filled with bad dialogue and the guys taking off their shirts at every possible scene." There. And he rated it 1 star, if you wanted to know.

Trust me on this. Every book/movie/band/singer that has 99% girl fans almost certainly is because there are handsome men/boys. As it is in New Moon. And the Jonas Brothers. Etcetra. Etcetra. (I hope I spelt that right)

So to the boys whose girlfriends are pestering them to take them to watch New Moon, you have been warned. Unless of course you are prepared to take a nap. And let your girlfriend ditch you. No? You know what to do.